Renowned counsellor, Mary Anna Adu-Gyamfi has advised couples to make a conscious effort to understand the different seasons that married couples go through.
According to her, it is important couples acknowledge and navigate these seasons in order to strengthen their relationship and build a solid foundation that can withstand any challenges that comes with marriage.
Speaking on the theme: “Building a Happy Marriage” during the Happy Mass Wedding Counselling Session, Mary Anna said marriages often go through various stages which may include the honeymoon phase where newlyweds swim in the joy and excitements of a fresh union, the settling stage where couples adjust to living together, the child-bearing phase where all the focus shifts on raising a family and the time to refresh the relationship when children leave home.
“The intimacy is good everybody says nice things to each other and that goes for a long while, the settling stage is where everything starts to settle and you see the man for himself and the woman for herself, the things she does that you don’t like will start manifesting but at that stage you must understand and know yourself and the person you are with. The realization stage is when everything comes out, the good and the bad. The child bearing stage also has to do with how you manage yourself and the children because some men are taking responsibility whereas others are not and everybody comes with his or her mindset, this stage especially in those times, it is important that you seek counsel.”
She believes being aware of these seasons and understanding the challenges can help couples navigate them more effectively because, “There would be a time where the man would not be happy about some actions of the woman and vice versa but with understanding you will be able to navigate through.”
Mary Ann encouraged couples to share personal experiences and emotions, advising them to avoid entertaining friends and relatives into the marriage, “Be careful with the kind of friends you are making. Some friends are not good some friends also get closer than siblings. It’s not everything happening in your marriage you tell your friends just the same way you don’t get up and tell your parents you just learn to solve issues among yourselves and then there are instances where people tell their friends about their marriage and the whole neighborhood gets to know about it.”
She further emphasized that it is crucial for couples to develop the habit of effective communication, which she believes is the foundation to a happy marriage.